belbell's Xanga

Friday, July 27, 2007

Fri, 27 Jul 2007 21:06:55 GMT

God is our therapy.

Sunday, July 15, 2007

Sun, 15 Jul 2007 20:59:38 GMT

I really do believe that one of the devil's best tool is busyness. Why do I even bother with it sometimes? All I know is that when I'm busy, I rush and that is also one of the devil's favorite tools. He makes me busy and then I rush and then I hurry and inside my stomach and heart gets very annoyed and then I feel like I'm too tired to deal with anyone.

I've been rushing... writing as fast I can in my journal, just because I feel like I dont' have time. In fact, I am even typing my xanga entry as quickly as I can... who knows why. It's an addiction I think. I've been rushing when I'm cleaning, shortening my quiet times and my sleep and rushing as if I have one of the most important roles in the world, as if what I do is the most important. Now I know why one of the ten commandments is to keep the sabbath day holy. God knows that we will run into the sin of busyness and forget what is important. He knows we'll lose control, freak out and burn out and then forget him. When we're busy, we know God takes too much time so we just set his book on the side or flip through it or read lines hoping that the two minutes we read a verse will help us the rest of the day.

Yesterday I did not want to read my bible but I knew I needed rest. Edginess, that's what happens when you are too busy. I think my new goal is to not be busy to just leave time for rest. Anyways, I decided if I can't read the bible I'd read the Oprah magazine/book that a friend lent me. I ended up reading an article by Kathleen Norris, a Christian writer, about how sleep can be one of the most spiritual things that we can receive from God. It's a sign that we give up control to God. It's rest.

Aside from this lesson I'm learning, I also realized that throughout our lives we just keep learning the same lesson over and over. I realized that I've been reading the same things in books, hearing the same things in sermons, it's just that God rewords it all or has another voice share the same thing with us until it really sinks in. I figure I had better listen this time around or else it'll come back to me eventually.

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

Tue, 03 Jul 2007 00:52:43 GMT

Been thinking about how lately I don't feel like we are all living as Christians, but more so like a bunch of people stuffed into a box with a piece of paper that says Christian church on it. So also been reading Blue Like Jazz and today I was reading about how most people think that faith is something to be lived alone. We live our own faiths out and we pray and work on our relationship with God, only during our devotion time and all that, all alone, but what about living our faith out as a church? Was talking with my sister when I had relationship issues (I don't know with who..=)) but she was saying that working through the situation was something that not only this guy and I had to work on, but it was something that the church or the body of Christ should also be involved in.

So although sometimes we have these issues that seem impossible to work through, they're not impossible because we have other people to help us, the body of Christ, like the other people who we see on Sundays, but really we shouldn't just speak with them on Sundays, we should be challenging and helping each other throughout the week. So if you're depressed, it's not something we go through alone, but it's something others help us with. Hmmm.. something I think we're missing in our churches, in our circle of friends, in our small groups, and in our families.

Saturday, June 30, 2007

Sat, 30 Jun 2007 20:02:46 GMT

You know I'm too busy when I don't even have time to write thoughts down in my xanga. I've had many thoughts but I've only shared them with myself and then I forgot what those thoughts were.

This week I was thinking about how offering is like putting money into a mutual fund. It's like entrusting your money to the church to distribute how it sees fit, which isn't a bad deal. The church puts some money in missions, scholarships, building fund, general and invests our money how it sees fit. It's like giving our money back to God by entrusting part of it to God's church completely. Pretty cool

Sunday, June 17, 2007

Sun, 17 Jun 2007 23:41:52 GMT

NO! That's my fish! Caught my first fish on Wing's bday, June 16th. He was only a little one, not cute at all, and ready to be eaten. Then went to experience Moroccan food and saw some bellydancing. Quite a place if you were to go for a first date.

Talk about weird. My dad is honestly passionate about jump roping. After eating cake for father's day, he patted his stomach and said, "ahhh.. I need to jumprope." And then he went on to tell me why jumproping is so great.

"You can do it rain, shine, anywhere." is what he said.

Well off for another week of work. I honestly am pretty tired of talking to the same people and just finding out what they did over the weekend. Not complaining because the residents I work with are by far some of the wisest and smartest. It's just that I see them every day and after seeing people every day it's hard to have really meaningful conversation. The more I talk too, the stranger people realize I am.

Saturday, June 16, 2007

Sat, 16 Jun 2007 16:26:16 GMT

Life is so weird you know... well I was inspired to write more because I read jsunkistc's xanga and it made me crack up. Just yesterday at bible study I started wondering the possibility that perhaps we're pronouncing Jesus' name wrong. People say my last name wrong all the time so maybe realy we are saying Jesus wrong. I was just picturing God and Jesus or Jesus and God meshed into one looking down on earth and hearing all these people mispronounce his name "Jeesus" when really he may want us to really call him Jeh-sus. Hmmm... we can only wonder.

I'm going to write a blah, meaning that I'm just thinking on and on and on. And just writing things which appear random to the typical person but for those with magical powers and telepathic minds, they will understand...
I do like running, and field hockey, but I'm not obssessed with only those things. I like cleaning dirty things and then looking at it afterwards realizing it's clean. I love using old socks and things to clean dirty things. I like coloring, making cards. Usually I never give the cards on time, but I like scrapbooking too when I have Creative Memories brand cutting tools. I like to read when I was in 4th grade. I like to watch dancing on So you Think you can dance, only because I used to watch figure skating, gymnastics, and Miss America pageants and used to wish I could do that. Yes, I used to want to be Miss America and would practice asking possible pageant questions to myself like "what is you platform?" When I got older they started asking questions like "I heard you're left handed, are you glad you are left handed?"

I also like to write and type and be weird and use made up words. I like to be quiet when I am around people I don't know know as well or when I'm tired. I like fresh air, and hearing genuine good sounds like in Kenya, the sound of African people singing. I like Digestive, which I also tasted for the first time in Kenya. In Hong Kong, I liked how you could walk around by yourself all the time and still feel safe, even if it was late at night. I didn't like how you would feel fat among all these skinny people there though. And I didn't like the humidity. I like how they didn't waste paper and made you carry around your own paper which made toilet paper, napkins and tissues all the same thing. I did have a hard time getting used to using the left side of the street. The bed mattresses were really thin which was weird. Last note... Happy birthday Wing. A very very good very good friend.=)

Friday, June 15, 2007

Fri, 15 Jun 2007 21:36:49 GMT

Hmmm..that is so funny... I don't remember posting that picture up. One tip, if you wear white, it makes you look chubbier, like a snow man.

We Caught a Fish at Lake Needwood

Fri, 15 Jun 2007 18:44:32 GMT

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Tue, 12 Jun 2007 20:06:28 GMT

I don't know why I just discovered how great and amazing it tasted until this year, but ice is my newest thing. Every morning I fill my water bottle with just ice and when I get to work I fill it with water until the ice is completely dissolved. When it is almost melted and not rock hard it tastes the best. It really gets me through most of my morning until about 10am. Don't even think I can explain it but I have cravings for it more than I have cravings for ice cream. Only downfall is that it leaves water on the outside of my bottle so whenever I leave it on the desk it leaves it sopping wet. Okay must go.

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Wed, 06 Jun 2007 19:49:43 GMT

Hey so today is Julia Winyan's and Bel's xanga entry.

We were looking at pictures online and these are the people Julia identified on her own. She said, "Yi Jurng" and I said, "HEY! How'd you know that's what he's called?" So props to Albert, she knows who you are.

Singapore Yiyi, Winyan knows you as "Singapo " a fter to day.y.y shjuhku nthj hj nnhnyh. tHERESHE KNOWs you too! That was Julia's part of the entry.

It sounded like "daufu" or tofu in chinese but I think she meant "Beau kau fo" Jeremy. And "beau yi" she knows you too. Sum. Promise I didn't tell her what your names were.. I don't even know what your names are in chinese.