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belbell
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Name: Bel
Birthday: 5/18/1983
Gender: Female
Interests: Playing outside, running, playing field hockey, pretending to be good at other sports, eating ice cream
Expertise: looking young, being grumpy
Occupation: Engineering
Message: message me
Member Since:
7/18/2004
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| I really do believe that one of the devil's best tool is
busyness. Why do I even bother with it sometimes? All I know is
that when I'm busy, I rush and that is also one of the devil's favorite
tools. He makes me busy and then I rush and then I hurry and inside my
stomach and heart gets very annoyed and then I feel like I'm too tired
to deal with anyone.
I've been rushing... writing as fast I can in my journal, just because
I feel like I dont' have time. In fact, I am even typing my xanga entry
as quickly as I can... who knows why. It's an addiction I think. I've
been rushing when I'm cleaning, shortening my quiet times and my sleep
and rushing as if I have one of the most important roles in the world,
as if what I do is the most important. Now I know why one of the
ten commandments is to keep the sabbath day holy. God knows that
we will run into the sin of busyness and forget what is important. He
knows we'll lose control, freak out and burn out and then forget
him. When we're busy, we know God takes too much time so we just
set his book on the side or flip through it or read lines hoping that
the two minutes we read a verse will help us the rest of the day.
Yesterday I did not want to read my bible but I knew I needed
rest. Edginess, that's what happens when you are too busy.
I think my new goal is to not be busy to just leave time for rest.
Anyways, I decided if I can't read the bible I'd read the Oprah
magazine/book that a friend lent me. I ended up reading an article by
Kathleen Norris, a Christian writer, about how sleep can be one of the
most spiritual things that we can receive from God. It's a sign
that we give up control to God. It's rest.
Aside from this lesson I'm learning, I also realized that throughout
our lives we just keep learning the same lesson over and over. I
realized that I've been reading the same things in books, hearing the
same things in sermons, it's just that God rewords it all or has
another voice share the same thing with us until it really sinks
in. I figure I had better listen this time around or else it'll
come back to me eventually.
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| Been thinking about how lately I don't feel like we are all living as Christians, but more so like a bunch of people stuffed into a box with a piece of paper that says Christian church on it. So also been reading Blue Like Jazz and today I was reading about how most people think that faith is something to be lived alone. We live our own faiths out and we pray and work on our relationship with God, only during our devotion time and all that, all alone, but what about living our faith out as a church? Was talking with my sister when I had relationship issues (I don't know with who..=)) but she was saying that working through the situation was something that not only this guy and I had to work on, but it was something that the church or the body of Christ should also be involved in.
So although sometimes we have these issues that seem impossible to work through, they're not impossible because we have other people to help us, the body of Christ, like the other people who we see on Sundays, but really we shouldn't just speak with them on Sundays, we should be challenging and helping each other throughout the week. So if you're depressed, it's not something we go through alone, but it's something others help us with. Hmmm.. something I think we're missing in our churches, in our circle of friends, in our small groups, and in our families.
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| You know I'm too busy when I don't even have time to write thoughts
down in my xanga. I've had many thoughts but I've only shared
them with myself and then I forgot what those thoughts were.
This week I was thinking about how offering is like putting money into
a mutual fund. It's like entrusting your money to the church to
distribute how it sees fit, which isn't a bad deal. The church
puts some money in missions, scholarships, building fund, general and
invests our money how it sees fit. It's like giving our money
back to God by entrusting part of it to God's church completely. Pretty
cool
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| NO! That's my fish! Caught my first fish on Wing's bday, June 16th. He was only a little one, not cute at all, and ready to be eaten. Then went to experience Moroccan food and saw some bellydancing. Quite a place if you were to go for a first date.
Talk about weird. My dad is honestly passionate about jump roping. After eating cake for father's day, he patted his stomach and said, "ahhh.. I need to jumprope." And then he went on to tell me why jumproping is so great.
"You can do it rain, shine, anywhere." is what he said.
Well off for another week of work. I honestly am pretty tired of talking to the same people and just finding out what they did over the weekend. Not complaining because the residents I work with are by far some of the wisest and smartest. It's just that I see them every day and after seeing people every day it's hard to have really meaningful conversation. The more I talk too, the stranger people realize I am.
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